The Hugh Hefner Memorial Page
As you can guess from the title, this page is my well-deserved tribute to Hugh Hefner, whom we all know and love as a great man, successful entrepreneur, and true feminist who represented everything that America is about.
Hugh Hefner's Contributions to Society
Hugh Hefner launched his famous magazine Playboy in 1953 with the boast, "First time in any magazine, FULL COLOR, the famous Marilyn Monroe NUDE." Inside were photographs from a nude calendar shoot she had reluctantly done five years earlier to make a car payment, in which she had tried not to be too recognizable, from which she had tried to distance herself, and to which Hef had purchased the rights for $500 without consulting her. Nonetheless, Marilyn Monroe was grateful for the opportunity to help build his career without ever even meeting him. "I never even received a thank-you from all those who made millions off a nude Marilyn photograph," she recalled with fondness. "I even had to buy a copy of the magazine to see myself in it." Hef purchased the grave next to hers in 1992, telling the Los Angeles Times, "I'm a believer in things symbolic. Spending eternity next to Marilyn is too sweet to pass up." Fittingly, he is now laid to rest next to this woman he never met, just as she would have wanted.
Many of Hef's critics have alleged that pornography causes women to be viewed as sex objects, but this is clearly untrue, as Hef himself held them in very high regard throughout his life. "The notion that Playboy turns women into sex objects is ridiculous," he explained in 2010. Women are sex objects. If women weren't sex objects, there wouldn't be another generation. It's the attraction between the sexes that makes the world go 'round. That's why women wear lipstick and short skirts." (Since then, scientists have discovered that in fact it's gravity that makes the world go 'round, but his general point still remains.) On another occasion he wrote, "Everybody, if they've got their head on straight, wants to be a sexual object."
Hef also explained in 2009, "Playboy was not a sex magazine, as far as I was concerned. Sex was simply part of the total package; I was trying to bring sex into the fold of a healthy lifestyle. When Penthouse and Hustler came along they confused what I was trying to do. Before they arrived, we were perceived as a sophisticated men’s magazine." He was merely echoing one of his earliest supporters, Dr. Harvey Cox, who wrote in Christianity and Crisis in 1961: "Playboy and its less successful imitators are not 'sex magazines' at all. They are basically anti-sexual. They dilute and dissipate authentic sexuality by reducing it to an accessory, by keeping it at a safe distance. It is precisely because these magazines are anti-sexual that they deserve the most searching kind of theological criticism. They foster a heretical doctrine of man, one at radical variance with the biblical view. For Playboy's man, others - especially women - are for him. They are his leisure accessories, his playthings. For the Bible, man only becomes fully man by being for the other."
Hef was therefore a natural ally of the feminist movement. On The Dick Cavett Show in 1970, feminist Susan Brownmiller praised Playboy's female empowerment, gushing, "The role that you have selected for women is degrading to women because you choose to see women as sex objects, not as full human beings. The day you’re willing to come out here with a cottontail attached to your rear end…" The shy and modest Hef only smiled and shook his head at the time, but he reciprocated such praise in private. In a secret memo leaked to the press by his secretaries that same year, he wrote, "What I'm interested in is the highly irrational, emotional, kookie [sic] trend that feminism has taken... these chicks are our natural enemy. It is time to do battle with them. What I want is a devastating piece that takes the militant feminists apart. They are unalterably opposed to the romantic boy-girl society that Playboy promotes."
Hef had a firm grasp of what the ideal woman should be like, telling journalist Oriana Fallaci that a Playmate was "a young, happy, simple girl - not a 'difficult' one." From even earlier than that, his deep conviction of women's rights led him to support birth control and abortion. He explained in 2010, Men had prophylactics - rubbers - so they had some control over reproduction, although rubbers were mainly supposed to be used to prevent disease, not for birth control. I was never enamored of prophylactics, so The Pill permitted the sexual act to be more natural and more loving." Praising this heroic and courageous stance, Elizabeth Fraterrigo wrote in Playboy and the Making of the Good Life in Modern America that he was "merely serving the best interests of Playboy, promoting more sex for women while reducing male responsibilities for unwanted pregnancy."
Too ambitious for just magazines, Hef established Playboy Clubs in a few major cities and advertised them as the most fun, glamorous and profitable place for attractive young girls to work. Though initially skeptical, undercover journalist Gloria Steinem confirmed this description to Show magazine in 1963: "A girl rushed in with her costume in her hand, calling for the wardrobe mistress as a wounded soldier might yell, 'Medic!' 'I've broken my zipper,' she wailed, 'I sneezed!' 'That's the third time this week,' said the wardrobe mistress sternly. 'It's a regular epidemic.' The girl apologized, found another costume and left. Could a sneeze really break a costume? 'Sure,' she said. 'Girls with colds usually have to be replaced.' She gave me a bright blue satin. It was so tight that the zipper caught my skin as she fastened the back... The whole costume was darted and seamed until it was two inches smaller than any of my measurements everywhere except the bust. 'You got to have room in there to stuff,' she said. Just about everybody stuffs'...
"I had been working for more than five hours with no break. My fingers were perforated and sore from pushing straight pins through cardboard, my arms ached from holding heavy coats. I was thoroughly chilled from the icy wind that blew in each time a customer opened the door, and, inside my three-inch black satin high heels, my feet were killing me. I walked over to ask the Chicago Bunny if I could take a break. Yes, she said, I could have a half-hour to eat, but no more... [I] took my shoes off gingerly and sat down next to two Negros in gray work uniforms. They looked sympathetic... The older one advised me about rolling bottles under my feet to relax them and getting arch supports for my shoes. I asked what they did. 'We're garbage men,' said the younger. 'It don't sound so good, I know, but it's easier than your job.'...The older one told me he felt sorry for the Bunnies even though he knew that some of them enjoyed 'showing off their looks.' He told me to be careful of my feet and not to try to work double shifts...
"I went back to the Bunny Room, turned in my costume and sat motionless, too tired to move. The stays had made precise indentations in my skin and the zipper had left a welt over my spine. I complained of the costume's tightness to the Bunny who was sitting next to me, also motionless. 'Yeah,' she said, 'a lot of girls get numb from the knee up. I think it presses on a nerve or something.'... [Serving drinks] seemed simple enough, but after an hour... my left arm began to shake and the blood seemed permanently drained from its fingers and hand. And I was still not getting paid. I complained to my Training Bunny but she said I really had no grounds for it. The girls hired before the December opening of the Club had trained for three weeks with no pay... $29.85 in cash tips - all in one-dollar bills and silver - makes for prosperity and a very uncomfortable costume. And I lost five pounds last night...
"A story in today's Metropolitan Daily was the talk of the Bunny Room. One of two ex-Bunnies who are suing the Club for back tips and 'misrepresentation' has told reporters that she received anonymous death threats immediately after filing the suit... At 3:00, when the final table had been cleared, I went back to the Bunny Room. The wardrobe mistress stopped me as I passed. 'Baby,' she said, 'that costume is way too big on you.' It was true that I had lost ten pounds in the few days since the costume had been made, and it was also true that, for the first time, it was no more uncomfortable than a tight girdle. She marked the waist with pins and told me to take it off. 'I'll have it fitting you right when you come tomorrow,' she said. 'Needs two inches off on each side.'" Though Gloria quit after only a few days, her feet went up half a shoe size as a permanent reminder of her thrilling adventure in Hugh Hefner's paradise.
Hef loved children too. "Instead of raising children in an adult world, with adult tastes, interests and opinions prevailing," he lamented, "we prefer to live much of our lives in a make-believe children’s world." It is fitting, then, that children are first exposed to pornography at the average age of 11, and that this may not have happened so quickly without Hef's pioneering work to make it a mainstream, multi-billion-dollar industry. The children's interests are indeed no longer a priority, just as Hef envisioned, though in a cruel twist of irony the same internet that facilitated this shift also struck a crippling blow to his own business.
Many of Hef's critics have alleged that pornography causes women to be viewed as sex objects, but this is clearly untrue, as Hef himself held them in very high regard throughout his life. "The notion that Playboy turns women into sex objects is ridiculous," he explained in 2010. Women are sex objects. If women weren't sex objects, there wouldn't be another generation. It's the attraction between the sexes that makes the world go 'round. That's why women wear lipstick and short skirts." (Since then, scientists have discovered that in fact it's gravity that makes the world go 'round, but his general point still remains.) On another occasion he wrote, "Everybody, if they've got their head on straight, wants to be a sexual object."
Hef also explained in 2009, "Playboy was not a sex magazine, as far as I was concerned. Sex was simply part of the total package; I was trying to bring sex into the fold of a healthy lifestyle. When Penthouse and Hustler came along they confused what I was trying to do. Before they arrived, we were perceived as a sophisticated men’s magazine." He was merely echoing one of his earliest supporters, Dr. Harvey Cox, who wrote in Christianity and Crisis in 1961: "Playboy and its less successful imitators are not 'sex magazines' at all. They are basically anti-sexual. They dilute and dissipate authentic sexuality by reducing it to an accessory, by keeping it at a safe distance. It is precisely because these magazines are anti-sexual that they deserve the most searching kind of theological criticism. They foster a heretical doctrine of man, one at radical variance with the biblical view. For Playboy's man, others - especially women - are for him. They are his leisure accessories, his playthings. For the Bible, man only becomes fully man by being for the other."
Hef was therefore a natural ally of the feminist movement. On The Dick Cavett Show in 1970, feminist Susan Brownmiller praised Playboy's female empowerment, gushing, "The role that you have selected for women is degrading to women because you choose to see women as sex objects, not as full human beings. The day you’re willing to come out here with a cottontail attached to your rear end…" The shy and modest Hef only smiled and shook his head at the time, but he reciprocated such praise in private. In a secret memo leaked to the press by his secretaries that same year, he wrote, "What I'm interested in is the highly irrational, emotional, kookie [sic] trend that feminism has taken... these chicks are our natural enemy. It is time to do battle with them. What I want is a devastating piece that takes the militant feminists apart. They are unalterably opposed to the romantic boy-girl society that Playboy promotes."
Hef had a firm grasp of what the ideal woman should be like, telling journalist Oriana Fallaci that a Playmate was "a young, happy, simple girl - not a 'difficult' one." From even earlier than that, his deep conviction of women's rights led him to support birth control and abortion. He explained in 2010, Men had prophylactics - rubbers - so they had some control over reproduction, although rubbers were mainly supposed to be used to prevent disease, not for birth control. I was never enamored of prophylactics, so The Pill permitted the sexual act to be more natural and more loving." Praising this heroic and courageous stance, Elizabeth Fraterrigo wrote in Playboy and the Making of the Good Life in Modern America that he was "merely serving the best interests of Playboy, promoting more sex for women while reducing male responsibilities for unwanted pregnancy."
Too ambitious for just magazines, Hef established Playboy Clubs in a few major cities and advertised them as the most fun, glamorous and profitable place for attractive young girls to work. Though initially skeptical, undercover journalist Gloria Steinem confirmed this description to Show magazine in 1963: "A girl rushed in with her costume in her hand, calling for the wardrobe mistress as a wounded soldier might yell, 'Medic!' 'I've broken my zipper,' she wailed, 'I sneezed!' 'That's the third time this week,' said the wardrobe mistress sternly. 'It's a regular epidemic.' The girl apologized, found another costume and left. Could a sneeze really break a costume? 'Sure,' she said. 'Girls with colds usually have to be replaced.' She gave me a bright blue satin. It was so tight that the zipper caught my skin as she fastened the back... The whole costume was darted and seamed until it was two inches smaller than any of my measurements everywhere except the bust. 'You got to have room in there to stuff,' she said. Just about everybody stuffs'...
"I had been working for more than five hours with no break. My fingers were perforated and sore from pushing straight pins through cardboard, my arms ached from holding heavy coats. I was thoroughly chilled from the icy wind that blew in each time a customer opened the door, and, inside my three-inch black satin high heels, my feet were killing me. I walked over to ask the Chicago Bunny if I could take a break. Yes, she said, I could have a half-hour to eat, but no more... [I] took my shoes off gingerly and sat down next to two Negros in gray work uniforms. They looked sympathetic... The older one advised me about rolling bottles under my feet to relax them and getting arch supports for my shoes. I asked what they did. 'We're garbage men,' said the younger. 'It don't sound so good, I know, but it's easier than your job.'...The older one told me he felt sorry for the Bunnies even though he knew that some of them enjoyed 'showing off their looks.' He told me to be careful of my feet and not to try to work double shifts...
"I went back to the Bunny Room, turned in my costume and sat motionless, too tired to move. The stays had made precise indentations in my skin and the zipper had left a welt over my spine. I complained of the costume's tightness to the Bunny who was sitting next to me, also motionless. 'Yeah,' she said, 'a lot of girls get numb from the knee up. I think it presses on a nerve or something.'... [Serving drinks] seemed simple enough, but after an hour... my left arm began to shake and the blood seemed permanently drained from its fingers and hand. And I was still not getting paid. I complained to my Training Bunny but she said I really had no grounds for it. The girls hired before the December opening of the Club had trained for three weeks with no pay... $29.85 in cash tips - all in one-dollar bills and silver - makes for prosperity and a very uncomfortable costume. And I lost five pounds last night...
"A story in today's Metropolitan Daily was the talk of the Bunny Room. One of two ex-Bunnies who are suing the Club for back tips and 'misrepresentation' has told reporters that she received anonymous death threats immediately after filing the suit... At 3:00, when the final table had been cleared, I went back to the Bunny Room. The wardrobe mistress stopped me as I passed. 'Baby,' she said, 'that costume is way too big on you.' It was true that I had lost ten pounds in the few days since the costume had been made, and it was also true that, for the first time, it was no more uncomfortable than a tight girdle. She marked the waist with pins and told me to take it off. 'I'll have it fitting you right when you come tomorrow,' she said. 'Needs two inches off on each side.'" Though Gloria quit after only a few days, her feet went up half a shoe size as a permanent reminder of her thrilling adventure in Hugh Hefner's paradise.
Hef loved children too. "Instead of raising children in an adult world, with adult tastes, interests and opinions prevailing," he lamented, "we prefer to live much of our lives in a make-believe children’s world." It is fitting, then, that children are first exposed to pornography at the average age of 11, and that this may not have happened so quickly without Hef's pioneering work to make it a mainstream, multi-billion-dollar industry. The children's interests are indeed no longer a priority, just as Hef envisioned, though in a cruel twist of irony the same internet that facilitated this shift also struck a crippling blow to his own business.
Hugh Hefner Remembered by Those Who Knew Him
Journalist Suzanne Moore recalled her great respect for Hef despite a miscommunication that led to some tension between them. "Long ago, in another time, I got a call from a lawyer. Hugh Hefner was threatening a libel action against me and the paper I worked for at the time, for something I had written. Journalists live in dread of such calls. I had called Hefner a pimp. To me this was not even controversial; it was self-evident. And he was just one of the many 'libertines' who had threatened me with court action over the years. It is strange that these outlaws have recourse in this way, but they do. But at the time, part of me wanted my allegation to be tested in a court of law. What a case it could have made. What a hoot it would have been to argue whether a man who procured, solicited and made profits from women selling sex could be called a pimp. Of course, central to Playboy’s ideology is the idea that women do this kind of thing willingly; that at 23 they want nothing more than to jump octogenarians...
"But this man is still being celebrated by people who should know better. You can dress it up with talk of glamour and bunny ears and fishnets, you can talk about his contribution to gonzo journalism, you can contextualise his drive to free up sex as part of the sexual revolution. But strip it all back and he was a man who bought and sold women to other men. Isn’t that the definition of a pimp? I couldn’t possibly say."
Hef's Girlfriends and Playmates also looked back on him with fondness. "Hefner and his staff encouraged playmates to use illegal drugs and coerced them into bisexual activities and orgies to satisfy Hefner's interests," Miki Garcia, Playboy's Miss January 1973, boasted to the U.S. Commission on Pornography. According to her, Playboy's heartwarming advice to the young girls was, "You are now a Playmate. Don't be so stuffy. It's all right to do this. It's L.A. chic. She falls prey to this." Wishing to give the modest millionaire full credit for the genius of his enterprise, she told them, "I want the public to recognize that Playboy magazine is not the 'coffee table' literature that Hugh Hefner says it is, but rather a pornographic magazine." Anthropologists have yet to determine how other Americans of that generation failed to notice that Playboy was a pornographic magazine.
Another former Girlfriend, Holly Madison, remembered Hef's firm belief in female choice and consent in her memoir Down the Rabbit Hole. "'Would you like a Quaalude?' Hef asked, leaning toward me with a bunch of large horse pills in his hands, held together by a crumpled tissue... Hef did not miss a beat: 'Okay, that's good,' he said, nonchalantly. 'Usually, I don't approve of drugs, but you know, in the '70s they used to call these pills thigh openers.' I want to scream ‘PAUSE!’ and freeze-frame that moment of my life. I want to grab that young girl, shake her back into reality and scream, ‘What the hell are you thinking?’" Of her friendships with the other girls in the Mansion, she recalled, "I learned Hef was the manipulator and that he pitted us against one another. I realized I wasn't treated well. I'm done being afraid of people. I don't have any loyalty to Hef. I haven't talked to him in four years, so there’s no reason to reach out now. Besides, it’s the truth."
Hef and Holly parted on good terms over some philosophical differences, though he would have preferred for her to stay. "It was there, in black and white. The will stated that $3,000,000 would be bestowed to Holly Madison at the time of his death (provided I still lived in the Mansion). At the time, it was more money than I’d ever know what to do with… But I didn’t want it. I actually pitied him for stooping to that level. I couldn’t help but be offended. Did he really think he could buy me? I put the folder back on the bed just as I had found it and never breathed a word of it." She told Us magazine that she wanted her daughter to read the book and learn all about her fun times with Hugh. "I want her to understand why I made the choices I made. And hopefully learn from them and not make stupid mistakes herself."
"[H]aving sex with Hef was part of the unspoken rules," Izabella St. James recalled with gratitude in Bunny Tales. "It was almost as if we had to do it in return for all of the things we had, for sharing his life at the Mansion. I think in his eyes, it was the only way we had of showing our gratitude for all he did for us. But expectation becomes an obligation, and obligations are not performed out of desire but of duty. And when I look at it that way, it makes me resentful and makes the whole thing ugly and meaningless. In the end, it always left me with conflicted emotions. I don't believe that many of the regular Girlfriends really wanted to have sex with Hef...
"Whenever any of the Girlfriends wanted something, he would use it as a major weapon: 'You know, you girls never do anything in the bedroom.' He never mentioned it to me, but I would hear about it. It certainly contradicted what he told me in the beginning of our relationship, which was that there was no pressure to participate in anything in the bedroom. Sometimes Emma and I pointed that out to him: 'We thought the relationship wasn't about sex, Hef?' He would get all defensive and say it wasn't. But we knew what he really wanted. Whenever a Girlfriend wanted something, she would have to participate more in the bedroom. Sex was a weapon, and it was skillfully used by both sides."
Carla Howe said of the Playboy Mansion in 2015, "When you’re here you have to be in by the 9pm curfew. You’re not allowed to invite any friends up to see you. You’re definitely not allowed male visitors. If you break the rules you get banned. Once you’re out, you’re out, you can’t come back. Hef’s wife Crystal went to do a DJ set miles away so she had to stay overnight. But she was still back by 2pm the next day." She also remarked on Hugh's reduced promiscuity in his old age. Lamenting her missed opportunity, she said, "I'm really relieved. In the past he would have slept with all the girls. We've heard stories about him having 16 girls in the grotto and once he’d finished they would be passed on to the next man there."
Her sister Melissa added, "If you do something wrong, you'll get an email. There's a strict code of conduct. There are even rules about Instagram and Twitter. You’ve got to show everything in a good light and if you’re drunk in a picture you’ll be in trouble... There are three dining tables. In one room is Hef’s top table where everyone wants to sit, then the family table which is second best. But in another room beside the kitchen is the table for the more lowly guests, the nobodies and the girls who've annoyed him. Hef decides the seating plan every day and no one wants to end up on that third table."
It is not my place to say what Hugh Hefner's eternal reward will be. Whatever God chooses to do with him is none of my business. However, I will do everything in my power to ensure that his mortal actions and legacy are recognized for what they truly are - and I'm doing exactly what he would have wanted. "I would like to think that I will be remembered as someone who had some positive impact on the sociosexual values of his time," he once said. "And I think I'm secure and happy in that."
"But this man is still being celebrated by people who should know better. You can dress it up with talk of glamour and bunny ears and fishnets, you can talk about his contribution to gonzo journalism, you can contextualise his drive to free up sex as part of the sexual revolution. But strip it all back and he was a man who bought and sold women to other men. Isn’t that the definition of a pimp? I couldn’t possibly say."
Hef's Girlfriends and Playmates also looked back on him with fondness. "Hefner and his staff encouraged playmates to use illegal drugs and coerced them into bisexual activities and orgies to satisfy Hefner's interests," Miki Garcia, Playboy's Miss January 1973, boasted to the U.S. Commission on Pornography. According to her, Playboy's heartwarming advice to the young girls was, "You are now a Playmate. Don't be so stuffy. It's all right to do this. It's L.A. chic. She falls prey to this." Wishing to give the modest millionaire full credit for the genius of his enterprise, she told them, "I want the public to recognize that Playboy magazine is not the 'coffee table' literature that Hugh Hefner says it is, but rather a pornographic magazine." Anthropologists have yet to determine how other Americans of that generation failed to notice that Playboy was a pornographic magazine.
Another former Girlfriend, Holly Madison, remembered Hef's firm belief in female choice and consent in her memoir Down the Rabbit Hole. "'Would you like a Quaalude?' Hef asked, leaning toward me with a bunch of large horse pills in his hands, held together by a crumpled tissue... Hef did not miss a beat: 'Okay, that's good,' he said, nonchalantly. 'Usually, I don't approve of drugs, but you know, in the '70s they used to call these pills thigh openers.' I want to scream ‘PAUSE!’ and freeze-frame that moment of my life. I want to grab that young girl, shake her back into reality and scream, ‘What the hell are you thinking?’" Of her friendships with the other girls in the Mansion, she recalled, "I learned Hef was the manipulator and that he pitted us against one another. I realized I wasn't treated well. I'm done being afraid of people. I don't have any loyalty to Hef. I haven't talked to him in four years, so there’s no reason to reach out now. Besides, it’s the truth."
Hef and Holly parted on good terms over some philosophical differences, though he would have preferred for her to stay. "It was there, in black and white. The will stated that $3,000,000 would be bestowed to Holly Madison at the time of his death (provided I still lived in the Mansion). At the time, it was more money than I’d ever know what to do with… But I didn’t want it. I actually pitied him for stooping to that level. I couldn’t help but be offended. Did he really think he could buy me? I put the folder back on the bed just as I had found it and never breathed a word of it." She told Us magazine that she wanted her daughter to read the book and learn all about her fun times with Hugh. "I want her to understand why I made the choices I made. And hopefully learn from them and not make stupid mistakes herself."
"[H]aving sex with Hef was part of the unspoken rules," Izabella St. James recalled with gratitude in Bunny Tales. "It was almost as if we had to do it in return for all of the things we had, for sharing his life at the Mansion. I think in his eyes, it was the only way we had of showing our gratitude for all he did for us. But expectation becomes an obligation, and obligations are not performed out of desire but of duty. And when I look at it that way, it makes me resentful and makes the whole thing ugly and meaningless. In the end, it always left me with conflicted emotions. I don't believe that many of the regular Girlfriends really wanted to have sex with Hef...
"Whenever any of the Girlfriends wanted something, he would use it as a major weapon: 'You know, you girls never do anything in the bedroom.' He never mentioned it to me, but I would hear about it. It certainly contradicted what he told me in the beginning of our relationship, which was that there was no pressure to participate in anything in the bedroom. Sometimes Emma and I pointed that out to him: 'We thought the relationship wasn't about sex, Hef?' He would get all defensive and say it wasn't. But we knew what he really wanted. Whenever a Girlfriend wanted something, she would have to participate more in the bedroom. Sex was a weapon, and it was skillfully used by both sides."
Carla Howe said of the Playboy Mansion in 2015, "When you’re here you have to be in by the 9pm curfew. You’re not allowed to invite any friends up to see you. You’re definitely not allowed male visitors. If you break the rules you get banned. Once you’re out, you’re out, you can’t come back. Hef’s wife Crystal went to do a DJ set miles away so she had to stay overnight. But she was still back by 2pm the next day." She also remarked on Hugh's reduced promiscuity in his old age. Lamenting her missed opportunity, she said, "I'm really relieved. In the past he would have slept with all the girls. We've heard stories about him having 16 girls in the grotto and once he’d finished they would be passed on to the next man there."
Her sister Melissa added, "If you do something wrong, you'll get an email. There's a strict code of conduct. There are even rules about Instagram and Twitter. You’ve got to show everything in a good light and if you’re drunk in a picture you’ll be in trouble... There are three dining tables. In one room is Hef’s top table where everyone wants to sit, then the family table which is second best. But in another room beside the kitchen is the table for the more lowly guests, the nobodies and the girls who've annoyed him. Hef decides the seating plan every day and no one wants to end up on that third table."
It is not my place to say what Hugh Hefner's eternal reward will be. Whatever God chooses to do with him is none of my business. However, I will do everything in my power to ensure that his mortal actions and legacy are recognized for what they truly are - and I'm doing exactly what he would have wanted. "I would like to think that I will be remembered as someone who had some positive impact on the sociosexual values of his time," he once said. "And I think I'm secure and happy in that."
