Is the LDS Church Homophobic?
See also the church's official site for gay and lesbian members. I considered the topic of same-sex marriage large enough to merit its own page.
I wrote this as a heteromantic asexual who was called "faggot" five times a day in elementary school and has a better chance of being killed by a meteorite than getting married in mortality. I technically fall under the LGBTQ umbrella, but I don't focus much on that because my challenges are different and much less severe than the majority. I never had much of a testimony of these particular teachings of my church. I struggled with them for over a decade but grudgingly accepted them because they came as a package deal with other things that I did believe. I don't blame anyone for choosing not to accept them, as I no longer do either. However, because it's been so widely misunderstood and misrepresented, I hope it's still of some use to explain The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints' position on homosexuality.
A Very Brief History of Gay Latter-day Saints
Have leaders of the church been homophobic? Yes. Homophobia, like racism, sexism and every conceivable human failing, has existed in the church, and plenty of hurtful and/or clueless things have been said and done in the not-too-distant past, even in the name of God. An extensive compendium of them can be found here. For the moment, I just want to acknowledge that this happened and it was wrong.
Within the last few decades, people's understanding of homosexuality has shifted from a behavior to a trait to an identity. In centuries past, "gay" individuals wouldn't self-identify that way and wouldn't understand what you meant if you asked them about it. The topic of homosexual behavior is addressed sparsely in the Bible and never in the Book of Mormon, even though the latter ostensibly was written for our day and contains the fulness of the gospel. Jesus never spoke about it (that we know of) while on the earth, and for over a century after its founding neither did the LDS Church. This is allegedly because the law of chastity (sexual purity) doesn't single out homosexuality or gay and lesbian individuals; it simply prohibits sexual activity of any kind outside of marriage. And marriage in Judeo-Christian thought, and in most of human civilization until very recent years, was implicitly understood to include a man and a woman (or occasionally multiple women). The LDS Church regards heterosexual marriage as essential for exaltation, or the highest level of heaven; see the next page for details. (This is never mentioned in the Book of Mormon either.)
The church's near-silence on homosexuality (or sodomy, as it was often called) changed after the Stonewall Riots in 1969 as it became a more visible issue in the United States, with LGBTQ people following the black civil rights movement in their own fight for greater respect and visibility after generations of persecution and stigma. In 1978 Boyd K. Packer explained: "There is a reason why we in the Church do not talk more openly about this subject. Some matters are best handled very privately. With many things it is easy - very easy - to cause the very things we are trying to avoid. On one occasion, with a friend of mine, I went to the medical center of a large university to see another friend who was a doctor there. In the waiting room before us was a low table covered with pamphlets describing various diseases. My friend observed: 'Well, there they are. Read enough about it and you'll think you've got it.'"
To make sense of the history one must realize that the church actually has no "doctrine" per se about gay and lesbian people - what to call them, why they are the way they are, whether they can change, etcetera. The doctrine is only that listed above on the need for heterosexual marriage and chastity outside of it, and church leaders have had to discuss LGBTQ issues as a result. What this means is that they used the terminology and definitions of secular society, which were in flux for decades. The term "homosexual" wasn't even in common usage until the 1950s, and it shifted in usage from a behavior to a disorder to an important piece of one's identity. The church's primary focus was always on behavior. Although a surface-level presentist reading of many quotes suggests otherwise, twentieth-century leaders and manuals rarely taught that anything analogous to an innate sexual orientation (as we understand it today) could be changed. They spoke of "curing" homosexuality in the same way that alcoholism could be "cured" - by changing habits and lifestyles, not by removing the inclination altogether. Even occasional references to "homosexual orientation", a term with widely divergent definitions in the 1970s and 80s, didn't mean what they would mean today. Church leaders and manuals did assert that people had moral agency, and that nobody was predestined or forced to engage in homosexual behavior because of the way they were born. Such statements are nowadays often oversimplified to claims that "being gay is a choice."
The church undoubtedly had gay and lesbian members from the nineteenth century onward, though of course they wouldn't have self-identified that way and most of them hid their orientation just as they would have in most contexts. John Taylor's son Arthur Bruce was evidently gay; he left the church and moved to Oregon in 1879 after discussing it with Joseph F. Smith. In 1965, BYU President Ernest Wilkinson told the student body that "we do not intend to admit to our campus any homosexuals. If any of you have this tendency and have not completely abandoned it, may I suggest that you leave the university immediately after this assembly... We do not want others on this campus to be contaminated by your presence.” In 1975 an excommunicated Latter-day Saint named Leonard Matlovich became the first openly gay man on the cover of Time magazine.
Within the last few decades, people's understanding of homosexuality has shifted from a behavior to a trait to an identity. In centuries past, "gay" individuals wouldn't self-identify that way and wouldn't understand what you meant if you asked them about it. The topic of homosexual behavior is addressed sparsely in the Bible and never in the Book of Mormon, even though the latter ostensibly was written for our day and contains the fulness of the gospel. Jesus never spoke about it (that we know of) while on the earth, and for over a century after its founding neither did the LDS Church. This is allegedly because the law of chastity (sexual purity) doesn't single out homosexuality or gay and lesbian individuals; it simply prohibits sexual activity of any kind outside of marriage. And marriage in Judeo-Christian thought, and in most of human civilization until very recent years, was implicitly understood to include a man and a woman (or occasionally multiple women). The LDS Church regards heterosexual marriage as essential for exaltation, or the highest level of heaven; see the next page for details. (This is never mentioned in the Book of Mormon either.)
The church's near-silence on homosexuality (or sodomy, as it was often called) changed after the Stonewall Riots in 1969 as it became a more visible issue in the United States, with LGBTQ people following the black civil rights movement in their own fight for greater respect and visibility after generations of persecution and stigma. In 1978 Boyd K. Packer explained: "There is a reason why we in the Church do not talk more openly about this subject. Some matters are best handled very privately. With many things it is easy - very easy - to cause the very things we are trying to avoid. On one occasion, with a friend of mine, I went to the medical center of a large university to see another friend who was a doctor there. In the waiting room before us was a low table covered with pamphlets describing various diseases. My friend observed: 'Well, there they are. Read enough about it and you'll think you've got it.'"
To make sense of the history one must realize that the church actually has no "doctrine" per se about gay and lesbian people - what to call them, why they are the way they are, whether they can change, etcetera. The doctrine is only that listed above on the need for heterosexual marriage and chastity outside of it, and church leaders have had to discuss LGBTQ issues as a result. What this means is that they used the terminology and definitions of secular society, which were in flux for decades. The term "homosexual" wasn't even in common usage until the 1950s, and it shifted in usage from a behavior to a disorder to an important piece of one's identity. The church's primary focus was always on behavior. Although a surface-level presentist reading of many quotes suggests otherwise, twentieth-century leaders and manuals rarely taught that anything analogous to an innate sexual orientation (as we understand it today) could be changed. They spoke of "curing" homosexuality in the same way that alcoholism could be "cured" - by changing habits and lifestyles, not by removing the inclination altogether. Even occasional references to "homosexual orientation", a term with widely divergent definitions in the 1970s and 80s, didn't mean what they would mean today. Church leaders and manuals did assert that people had moral agency, and that nobody was predestined or forced to engage in homosexual behavior because of the way they were born. Such statements are nowadays often oversimplified to claims that "being gay is a choice."
The church undoubtedly had gay and lesbian members from the nineteenth century onward, though of course they wouldn't have self-identified that way and most of them hid their orientation just as they would have in most contexts. John Taylor's son Arthur Bruce was evidently gay; he left the church and moved to Oregon in 1879 after discussing it with Joseph F. Smith. In 1965, BYU President Ernest Wilkinson told the student body that "we do not intend to admit to our campus any homosexuals. If any of you have this tendency and have not completely abandoned it, may I suggest that you leave the university immediately after this assembly... We do not want others on this campus to be contaminated by your presence.” In 1975 an excommunicated Latter-day Saint named Leonard Matlovich became the first openly gay man on the cover of Time magazine.
For several years aversion therapy was considered by the medical community to be an effective treatment for homosexual feelings, and conducted at many universities. At BYU in the mid-1970s, graduate student Max McBride and faculty mentor Dr. Eugene Thorne conducted one relatively small aversion therapy study on seventeen male subjects. As McBride's dissertation indicates, "It was mandatory that all subjects chosen to participate sign and have witnessed a prepared statement explaining (a) the experimental nature of the treatment procedure, (b) the use of aversive electric shock, (c) the showing of 35 mm slides that might be construed by subject as possibly offensive, and (d) that Brigham Young University was not in any direct way endorsing the procedures used. This was to insure that all subjects were in full agreement and understanding as to what the treatment procedure would involve, provide and demand from them." Robert Card, a psychologist in Salt Lake City who also worked on the BYU campus with students during the 1970s, used more extreme (and equally ineffective) methods involving pornography and induced vomiting. Gay men participated under duress from local leaders or university administrators and often found it very traumatic. A few died by suicide.
One of the first sources to bring public attention to this issue was a February 1984 episode of the Australian version of 60 Minutes, "Saints and Sinners." Interviewer Gary L. Stone said, of Dr. Card's treatment, "It's destructive. They are purposely trying to destroy you. If you are a homosexual in the church, you have only three options- you can lie, you can die or you can disappear." Dr. Card ceased this treatment around this time. During the AIDS epidemic, stake president and future Apostle Quentin L. Cook ministered to several church members dying from the disease. In 1987 LDS poet Carol Lynn Pearson published Goodbye, I Love You, a memoir about her gay husband whose life was also claimed. Leonard Matlovich died from it the next year, but not before he wrote his own epitaph: "When I was in the military they gave me a medal for killing two men, and a discharge for loving one."
By the 1990s, the church's rhetoric made an explicit distinction between same-sex attraction (or orientation), which was not considered a sin, and homosexual behavior, which was. It didn't teach that the former could be changed. Yet from 1996 to 2011, it allowed General Authorities to speak at almost every conference of Evergreen International, a now-defunct independent organization based on its teachings that aimed to help people "diminish same-sex attractions and overcome homosexual behavior."
The LDS Church remained a toxic place for LGBT individuals. In February 2000, BYU graduate Stuart Matis wrote to the student newspaper the Daily Universe: "I am gay. I am also LDS. My first same-sex attraction occurred when I was seven, and for the next 25 years, I have never been attracted to women. I realized the significance of my sexuality when I was around thirteen, and for the next two decades, I traveled down a tortuous path of internalized homophobia, immense self-hatred, depression and suicidal thoughts. Despite the calluses on my knees, frequent trips to the temple, fasts and devotion to my mission and church callings such as elders’ quorum president, I continually failed to attenuate my homosexuality.
"I came out last year. My bishop and my father each gave me a blessing inspired by the spirit that proclaimed that I was indeed gay and that I would remain gay. Thus, I read a recent letter to the editor with great regret. The author compared my friends and me to murderers, Satanists, prostitutes, pedophiles and partakers of bestiality. Imagine having to live with this rhetoric constantly being spewed at you.
"My aunt is a psychiatrist in Ogden and has worked with over 1,000 gay Latter-day Saints. Because of her work with these church members, she has been forced by necessity to specialize in homosexuality, depression and suicide.
"I implore the students at BYU to re-assess their homophobic feelings. Seek to understand first before you make comments. We have the same needs as you. We desire to love and be loved. We desire to live our lives with happiness. We are not a threat to you or your families. We are your sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, neighbors, co-workers and friends, and most importantly, we are all children of God."
His suicide note read, "I am now free... I am no longer in pain and I no longer hate myself. As it turns out, God never intended for me to be straight. Perhaps my death might become the catalyst for some good."
Beginning in the late 1970s, the LDS Church oppposed the legal redefinition of marriage to include same-sex unions (particularly in the United States), a topic which I treat on a separate page.
By the 1990s, the church's rhetoric made an explicit distinction between same-sex attraction (or orientation), which was not considered a sin, and homosexual behavior, which was. It didn't teach that the former could be changed. Yet from 1996 to 2011, it allowed General Authorities to speak at almost every conference of Evergreen International, a now-defunct independent organization based on its teachings that aimed to help people "diminish same-sex attractions and overcome homosexual behavior."
The LDS Church remained a toxic place for LGBT individuals. In February 2000, BYU graduate Stuart Matis wrote to the student newspaper the Daily Universe: "I am gay. I am also LDS. My first same-sex attraction occurred when I was seven, and for the next 25 years, I have never been attracted to women. I realized the significance of my sexuality when I was around thirteen, and for the next two decades, I traveled down a tortuous path of internalized homophobia, immense self-hatred, depression and suicidal thoughts. Despite the calluses on my knees, frequent trips to the temple, fasts and devotion to my mission and church callings such as elders’ quorum president, I continually failed to attenuate my homosexuality.
"I came out last year. My bishop and my father each gave me a blessing inspired by the spirit that proclaimed that I was indeed gay and that I would remain gay. Thus, I read a recent letter to the editor with great regret. The author compared my friends and me to murderers, Satanists, prostitutes, pedophiles and partakers of bestiality. Imagine having to live with this rhetoric constantly being spewed at you.
"My aunt is a psychiatrist in Ogden and has worked with over 1,000 gay Latter-day Saints. Because of her work with these church members, she has been forced by necessity to specialize in homosexuality, depression and suicide.
"I implore the students at BYU to re-assess their homophobic feelings. Seek to understand first before you make comments. We have the same needs as you. We desire to love and be loved. We desire to live our lives with happiness. We are not a threat to you or your families. We are your sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, neighbors, co-workers and friends, and most importantly, we are all children of God."
His suicide note read, "I am now free... I am no longer in pain and I no longer hate myself. As it turns out, God never intended for me to be straight. Perhaps my death might become the catalyst for some good."
Beginning in the late 1970s, the LDS Church oppposed the legal redefinition of marriage to include same-sex unions (particularly in the United States), a topic which I treat on a separate page.
The Church's Current Stance on Gay and Lesbian Members
In 2015 the head of the Church's Public Affairs Department, Michael Otterson, commented, "Certainly you don’t have to be very old to remember a time when some of the language used in the Church to describe homosexual behavior was intemperate, even harsh, by today’s standards.... But the fundamentals haven't changed. Sex outside marriage is morally wrong, by God’s law. Sex with a person of the same sex is wrong, by that same standard. The doctrine hasn’t changed, but our way of addressing it has changed significantly."
For example, Gordon B. Hinckley said, "I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married."
Dallin H. Oaks said, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness 'to bear one another's burdens'."
M. Russell Ballard said, "I want anyone who is a member of the church who is gay or lesbian to know I believe you have a place in the kingdom and recognize that sometimes it may be difficult for you to see where you fit in the Lord’s Church, but you do. We need to listen to and understand what our LGBT brothers and sisters are feeling and experiencing. Certainly, we must do better than we have done in the past so that all members feel they have a spiritual home where their brothers and sisters love them and where they have a place to worship and serve the Lord."
Gay and lesbian people in and out of the church, especially teenagers and young adults, remain at a very high risk for depression and suicide. Despite many assertions to that effect, no causation between church teachings or policies and suicide rates has ever been proven. But that doesn't mean everything is fine. Many gay and lesbian Saints have expressed their desperate prayers and attempts to become straight, and the frustration and self-loathing that resulted from being unable to do so. The church doesn't currently teach this or encourage trying it. Some denominations believe that merely being attracted to the same sex is a sin. The church doesn't teach that either, but many members have believed it. Because no one ever explained any of these issues to me as a kid, I once believed it too, and ignored the voice in my head that said "That makes no sense and you know it." I ignored it until about the time I learned that one of my close friends and fellow Saints (at the time) was gay. As he confided in me and started to cry, I wondered silently, If it bothers you that much, why don't you just... you know... not be gay? And then I got it.
Latter-day Saints who really believe in Jesus need to foster a culture of love and inclusion with no ifs, ands or buts. I believe one of their biggest areas for improvement is to stop being so preoccupied over whether gay and lesbian members "act on it". For one thing, they don't hold straight members to the same standard even though they're just as capable of breaking the law of chastity, and for another, it's none of their business. Jesus never once hesitated to show love to someone out of fear that he would be "approving their lifestyle" or whatever. There's no excuse for anyone else to do so.
Bruce C. Hafen infamously told gay and lesbian Saints at the 2009 Evergreen Conference, "If you are faithful, on resurrection morning - and maybe even before then - you will rise with normal attractions for the opposite sex. Some of you may wonder if that doctrine is too good to be true. But Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said it must be true, because 'there is no fullness of joy in the next life without a family unit, including a husband and wife, and posterity.' And 'men (and women) are that they might have joy.'" Yet he church has no official position on how same-sex attraction will play out in the next life. Many still share Oaks' and Hafen's assumption, but naturally this rubs many gay and lesbian Saints the wrong way. Even the most chaste among them tend to feel that their same-sex attraction is an essential and irreplaceable part of who they are, and that God made them that way for a reason and it isn't a "problem" that needs to be "fixed." I think Latter-day Saints just need to withhold judgment and not make assumptions about how things will work out.
For example, Gordon B. Hinckley said, "I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married."
Dallin H. Oaks said, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness 'to bear one another's burdens'."
M. Russell Ballard said, "I want anyone who is a member of the church who is gay or lesbian to know I believe you have a place in the kingdom and recognize that sometimes it may be difficult for you to see where you fit in the Lord’s Church, but you do. We need to listen to and understand what our LGBT brothers and sisters are feeling and experiencing. Certainly, we must do better than we have done in the past so that all members feel they have a spiritual home where their brothers and sisters love them and where they have a place to worship and serve the Lord."
Gay and lesbian people in and out of the church, especially teenagers and young adults, remain at a very high risk for depression and suicide. Despite many assertions to that effect, no causation between church teachings or policies and suicide rates has ever been proven. But that doesn't mean everything is fine. Many gay and lesbian Saints have expressed their desperate prayers and attempts to become straight, and the frustration and self-loathing that resulted from being unable to do so. The church doesn't currently teach this or encourage trying it. Some denominations believe that merely being attracted to the same sex is a sin. The church doesn't teach that either, but many members have believed it. Because no one ever explained any of these issues to me as a kid, I once believed it too, and ignored the voice in my head that said "That makes no sense and you know it." I ignored it until about the time I learned that one of my close friends and fellow Saints (at the time) was gay. As he confided in me and started to cry, I wondered silently, If it bothers you that much, why don't you just... you know... not be gay? And then I got it.
Latter-day Saints who really believe in Jesus need to foster a culture of love and inclusion with no ifs, ands or buts. I believe one of their biggest areas for improvement is to stop being so preoccupied over whether gay and lesbian members "act on it". For one thing, they don't hold straight members to the same standard even though they're just as capable of breaking the law of chastity, and for another, it's none of their business. Jesus never once hesitated to show love to someone out of fear that he would be "approving their lifestyle" or whatever. There's no excuse for anyone else to do so.
Bruce C. Hafen infamously told gay and lesbian Saints at the 2009 Evergreen Conference, "If you are faithful, on resurrection morning - and maybe even before then - you will rise with normal attractions for the opposite sex. Some of you may wonder if that doctrine is too good to be true. But Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said it must be true, because 'there is no fullness of joy in the next life without a family unit, including a husband and wife, and posterity.' And 'men (and women) are that they might have joy.'" Yet he church has no official position on how same-sex attraction will play out in the next life. Many still share Oaks' and Hafen's assumption, but naturally this rubs many gay and lesbian Saints the wrong way. Even the most chaste among them tend to feel that their same-sex attraction is an essential and irreplaceable part of who they are, and that God made them that way for a reason and it isn't a "problem" that needs to be "fixed." I think Latter-day Saints just need to withhold judgment and not make assumptions about how things will work out.
![I AM [crossed out] GAY [crossed out] STRAIGHT [crossed out] BI [crossed out] TRANSGENDER [not crossed out] ...A PERSON](/uploads/4/9/4/8/49486603/published/3709242.jpg?1571359430)
Thinking Differently About Same-Sex Attraction
When I still believed in these teachings, the perspective offered in this presentation offered me more peace of mind and food for thought than anything else I had ever heard or read on the subject. A transcript is available here but doesn't contain everything in the video. Take it for whatever it's worth.
Resources for Gay and Lesbian Latter-day Saints
The inclusion of any given organization on this list is not a personal endorsement of everything it teaches or practices, but simply done in hope of providing as many options to benefit as many people as possible. I wouldn't encourage gay or lesbian people to stay in the church but I respect and support those who are trying to do so. Some of these resources also provide support for transgender or other individuals.
Affirmation: LGBTQ Mormons, Families & Friends
Beyond the Block (podcast for "the marginalized in Mormonism")
Circling the Wagon Conferences
Emmaus LGBTQ Ministry (the one I'm most personally involved with)
Emmaus LGBTQ Ministry (Facebook group)
I'll Walk With You
I'll Walk With You (Facebook group for parents of LGBTQ children)
Latter Gay Stories (podcast)
Listen, Learn & Love
Mama Dragons (support for mothers of LGBTQ children)
Member Stories (from the official church site)
Mormonism and same-sex attraction (FAIR wiki section)
No More Strangers: LGBT Mormon Forum
North Star
Out in Zion: Honoring Faith, Gender, and Sexual Orientation
Rainbow Mutual
Suicide Prevention and Ministering (official church site)
Understanding Sexuality, Gender, and Allyship (BYU club)
Utah Pride Center
Affirmation: LGBTQ Mormons, Families & Friends
Beyond the Block (podcast for "the marginalized in Mormonism")
Circling the Wagon Conferences
Emmaus LGBTQ Ministry (the one I'm most personally involved with)
Emmaus LGBTQ Ministry (Facebook group)
I'll Walk With You
I'll Walk With You (Facebook group for parents of LGBTQ children)
Latter Gay Stories (podcast)
Listen, Learn & Love
Mama Dragons (support for mothers of LGBTQ children)
Member Stories (from the official church site)
Mormonism and same-sex attraction (FAIR wiki section)
No More Strangers: LGBT Mormon Forum
North Star
Out in Zion: Honoring Faith, Gender, and Sexual Orientation
Rainbow Mutual
Suicide Prevention and Ministering (official church site)
Understanding Sexuality, Gender, and Allyship (BYU club)
Utah Pride Center
Individual Websites and Blogs
These individuals are still members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints with varying life paths and degrees of orthodoxy. I don't present their stories to assert that this is the right way for everyone to go, and I hope nobody else does either. But their perspectives are often glossed over, and their choices derided as inauthentic, invalid, or impossible. It is often our detractors, more than Latter-day Saints themselves, who drive an alienating wedge between the LGBTQ community and the Church, and cause pain and confusion for Saints with same-sex attraction, because it is they who push the narrative that the two are incompatible. Yet these individuals deserve the same respect and consideration as anyone else.
Abigayle Dawn
Ben Schilaty
Blaire Ostler
Courtney Jensen
Dennis Schleicher (author of the bestseller Is He Nuts? Why a Gay Man Would Become a Member of the Church of Jesus Christ)
(Gay) Mormon Guy
The Gay R.M.
Mitch Mayne
Nerdy Gay Mormon
Spencer Stevens
Voices of Hope bios
Abigayle Dawn
Ben Schilaty
Blaire Ostler
Courtney Jensen
Dennis Schleicher (author of the bestseller Is He Nuts? Why a Gay Man Would Become a Member of the Church of Jesus Christ)
(Gay) Mormon Guy
The Gay R.M.
Mitch Mayne
Nerdy Gay Mormon
Spencer Stevens
Voices of Hope bios
